We had a long chat about why my son shouldn’t let the expectations of others influence him
Many years ago, one of our kids, who is obsessed with dressing up, had done enough good deeds to earn himself a new costume. He was about four years old, and we took him to the shop to make his choice. Almost immediately he chose a Minnie Mouse outfit. We duly bought it, and for many weeks afterwards we had Minnie Mouse with us around the house and on every excursion. Nobody seemed to bat an eyelid, and then one day we were invited to a huge family get-together. It felt too complicated to take him in the costume, as we knew that relatives would ask questions, or somebody would make a comment, and we would be upset that he had to hear from a dissenter within our own ranks. And so we made the decision to ask him to wear something else.
I have since regretted that decision, and have often found myself wondering if it showed a lack of guts on our part as parents, as well as being a poor message to send to our son. I take some solace from the fact that we told him he had to wear something smart, and he avoided the obvious loophole of pointing out that Minnie actually wears a dress that is suitable for both formal and casual occasions.
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